ALL THE PLUSLES AND MINUNS.

A new batch of earrings have been made. Please buy them.
$10 a pair.

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Question: Is a narwhal a confused unicorn, or a unicorn a confused narwhal? That is to say, are narwhals just hatin’ on unicorns for being magical, or unicorns hating narwhals for actually existing? Philosophical question of the day, take as you will.

NipponCon 2012

Manning the Confused Narwhal? Table. Trying to be excited, even though we were stuck in an isolated pool room. First year cons = bad idea.

Otaku Fest 2012

Manning the Confused Narwhal? Table

WE WANT READERS!

WE WANT READERS!

Jimenez-Porter Writer’s House project. Check it out .

30 April Poem

I swear, I just heard about NaPoWriMo, but I’ve written at least one poem a day. Only today did I post it. Next year, I’ll totally come post some stuff!

 

An Executive’s Prayer

 

There’s too much work to consummate, where

does one start? I want to sit

here, and I will defend my (right)

to sit, here. And I will breathe in my air

with the lungs I created, with the body

I consciously maneuver, with the blood

I have willfully dispersed and exhorted,

Go, into all body parts, and preach

good health!  This body is mine

as I have made it mine, I have formed

the ability to persuade my fingers into writing,

I have dictated my acquisition of ambling,

I have grown out my hair and nails with commands—

Grow! Or there shall be no profit

for the winter. I have proposed

our open-arrangement truce,  for there

are too many dictations to pronounce,

 

Who is he, to define the path of my happiness?

For what is a hymen, what is a limb?

Who is he, to be bound as my delight?

 

Now surely, tell me now—who am I

to not have the right to cast judgment

upon the small thing that dares

to furrow itself into my womb?

 

Book Signing

I’ve decided that when my books come out in June, I am adopting Pat’s policy:

http://blog.patrickrothfuss.com/2007/08/faq-if-i-mail-you-my-book-will-you-sign-it/

another customer response

AWESOME! i love them. thank you so much. your talent is unworldly.

-snotface666

I have never gotten an e-harmony account

I have never gotten an e-harmony account

because I told myself I wasn’t that desperate,
that I was a woman, that this was good, I could do my own
thing until a man came out of nowhere, on a horse
like the old spice man, man.

and now here I am, single, writing
bad love poems about why I love chess playing
men, and what that says about my superiority complex.

I’ve considered becoming amish so I can use
the amish dating site, so I can ride
a horse and wear bonnets and there are no
strip clubs in middle-of-nowhere, Pennsylvania.
I can know. I can know
I am all he gets.

I made an advertisement for the penny saver,
craig’s list, ebay, the grocery store bulletin board.
It reads:
wanted. single Christian man for potential relationship.
Asians preferred. must be able to tolerate
rants, tears, narcissism. must accept hand-
holding, photo-booth pictures, and watching
the cherry blossoms fall like years, over us.
interested candidates should respond via email.

I did not post it anywhere, except this poem,
which perhaps he will find, perhaps someone
can find this unstable poet sexually
attractive, and he will be the one and yes,
I will be the sleeping aurora, the woman
who slowly emerges, satiated.

woman’s right…

woman’s rights advocacy campaign

sometimes i want to strip
in the middle of the student union. just
stand there naked as a testament.

this is my body, i’d say. and i would break
each limb until I was limp. I would look
into their eyes like street vendor preachers—
I do this in rememberance of you.

I would lay on the student union floor
and people would walk
over my body. they would step
carefully, they’d notice
my purpled skin then talk
about their chem. test. the janitors
would touch my body with their mop
heads, gentle provocation. it’s time
to wake up now. it’s time to accept
the way they are and walk forward.

This is an entry for the Mookychick blogging competition, FEMINIST FLASH FICTION 2011. Enter now.

(“FEMINIST FLASH FICTION 2011. Enter now” should link to http://bit.ly/femflash)